Saturday, March 2, 2024

Jim Meirose, Bed

 


Bed Enameled, image by Daniel Y. Harris


Bed                                                                                                 

Roll’d over, as it’d engulfed them completely by that time. Judge, they could not have known where they were any more. But.

Hurry! Hurry! In one piece!

One piece’ll huff’n ‘nd puffin’n blow but one piece-part. Pip!

Party!

Smooth-sailing.

Wonderful!

Top-mayor this time met with the General Manager, who’d called that morning only saying, Eh Top? Ya, me. Okay there’s a plan on the desk here, come on, yes. Yes, a possible way out, yes. I know—oil-painted sailing ship on the office wall looming larger than ever and ever—perhaps it does seem to have taken a bit too (0) long but, behind the painted panel jut’d two screws holding the picture hangers—so all-consumingly important while the picture’s being hung, especially if there’s a glass picture-face, and a hard floor beneath, so important. 1 2 3 4 3 4 5 6 7  Oh so, so important, that litsy-bitsy hook’s the world it seems; all the world, it seems; ‘til, the juke drops safe n’ sound into the safe of the bolthook, and the attention drains back off the hook’d back, to the much more enjoyable to swoon over sailing-ship front. And, the hook—though still important and the cause of the offices overall stability, and thence happiness—is—forgotten. Never thought of again. Just, forgotten. U’. Anyway, but; I got a plan put together. Can you come down and see it and listen to it, from out this same mouth speaking now, but then and there as I propose it, it will be so damn much closer so-so, see, you will find yourself unable to resist. The idea popped out back while they were all crying, Anthony Haas’ house blew up, Ma! Ma’ bunny! Li’l bunny! Li’l bunnies’ house blew up! Drive me out to see it, can you Dad? Can you oh can you oh oh can you, Dad? 5 6 7 8 9 6 7 8 9 10 8 9 10 The rain it’s pouring and it's after dark, I know, but please, Dad? Please? A drive? A drive I can blast the car radio in, Dad? So I can so I can nag nag nag nag, Dad? So I can blast the car radio, the radio car radio, so, I can blast, and then blast, the car radio then. ‘nd again, and again, and again?

Thank you Dad!

(snort)

After that we felt that the forms we’d devised may not have been needed at all. Nor the whole census itself, perhaps, but—no, hey, listen. Do not look so amazed. Or look doubtful, either. Here, here. Heavens To Betsy Burry’s Are Good. Plus, it’s possible—it just may be possible, Bunny, that what happens when planet Earth finally gets pushed off the edge may not—no do not call him Bunny, Mom. At least not in front of the other kids, because they will make fun. 11 12 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 14 15 They mean the death of all on board, but rather, yah, and that goes for that other one, too. Yes, that one sitting over there, see them? See them chopping up that great big board with that—that damned thing. That’s the one you so offhandedly called Sweet Pea. I mean, look who you are calling Sweet Pea. Or Bunny, even. Sweet Pea. Bunny. Hear them? Don’t both sound ridiculous? For God’s sake, please; heavens to Betsy, Burry’s are good. See? Hear? See hear how silly? This is why we started think that this kind of “death” may not actually be “death” at all. No no no, but—a kind of, ahem, other place, you see. Just like this place. But lower. This said, then, if I were you, I’d call them no more Bunny, M-Mommy. Plus no more Sweet Pea ‘la looney-t’, too. Just as good planets forced out of existence the way we’ve been worried over, may actually end up in a lower place, that all the pointers to which just got forcibly severed, damn tootin’. 16 17 18 19 20 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24  Which may not even be a problem at all, you see. Damn-damn tootin’. Like; the way you were saying there’s a big blown up house over there? Eh? Could be worse you know. Could be your house, you know. Right, Sweet Pea, Bunny? Yes? Right? Wrong? Or maybe even who cares, Bunny? Hah. Why did we not see this sooner as so simple? Seems like as a collective species we have forsaken such simple alternatives. We lost sight of the fact that the folks hereabouts aren’t the only folks that be. Shows that we need to keep on, ‘n go on, ‘n try harder, lookin’. But anyway, what? Oh? Where’s my proof, you ask? Okay—here’s my proof; I just sent those two spouses +Proust+ to the MOON nah nah nah, he, I funnied! I keed. Yes, I keed! Please, disregard all such outbursts. Bailiff, please bailiff, ah bailiff, a Gimi ah bailiff please, pl-l-lease—and thank you. Oh thank you. Anyway, Judge, the way things were ripped, I looked down in the car from the upper left quadrant. I observed Master Haas sitting 25 26 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 28 29 30 31 32 29 30 31 32  (33) 32 31 30 29 32 31 30 29 28 30 29 28 27 26 25 24 23 26 25 there round, while his out-of state MommaPop/great big PoppyMomma, or two three or more, ignored his plight completely. I mean it was like—it was—like, eh ah wah eh hey Puk-the-big-Ray, my terminal’s off the center-line today. It was that bad a problem. And the cries such as, If you please, Gimi, up out of the noise, please—laced with Never mind that, Bunny, never mind this. Just take cover, Gimi—but why’d you take cover ‘nd leave me out here? Sweet honey it was pitiful to hear. Like, Out here all bony like this, Gimi? Why, Gimi, my Bunny, my Pea? And they went on to claim that if Anthony were really Bunny, and not at all the Anthony he just happens to be, then the rule to apply would be that same old hollow law what drove Top-mayor’s first simultaneous jawdropper, remember? Remember their “incomprehensible mutterances off the center line”?  But never mind that—but hey, look. Can you explain to the gallery what are all these ripped-up white fragments strewn out from the side of this freshly exploded house, PopMommy? You ought not be calling your children such names, MommyPop. These poor wretches need to be able to survive the playground at recess, where there’s gutlevel suckerpunches readymade to be thrown, like this 24 23 22 21 20 19 18 17 16 20 19 18 17 16 OOF! oh ma OOF! like that and like that, I mean for God’s sake, shaking down my head, and my head and my head and my ‘illina ‘illina stil’ down t’ road hipsla-tango!

Don’t play dumb! You know what I said!

                        .

Yes you do! Don’t deny!

                                 !

Oh! Still?

              !

No that can’t be.

              .

No, no. That can’t be.

              .

 Okay, step back, get ready, you asked for it NO okay you asked for it; ASK YOUR DOCTOR that can’t be! Heavens, there’s a big well well well YOUR DOCTOR IF well it’s th’ ‘tte, Top-mayor’s is a . big blown To no no DOCTOR IF EXPERIMENTAL no no that can’t b’ big blown up Betsy be well IF EXPERIMENTAL MATHEMATICS (mathematics? What the hell?) it first is no blown up house that Burry’s . {shut up damn you you asked for this you wanted this}. can’t EXPERIMENTAL MATHEMATICS IS (Jesus, Christ Jesus, Christ Jesus Christ, 15 14 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 12 11 D-d’ Jesus the Christ, tell me please kindly maker what the heaven or hell is this experimental mathematics la stupid la silly la la ala la {eck!} be yes well it up house there is and are no way IS RIGHT . . . simultaneous no that can’t be well good, it is anyway! No IS RIGHT FOR no; that can’t be jawdropper’d yes, well it is not no RIGHT FOR YOU no way uncle Donald no way no-no way  that can’t be well it is = no? What? No! That can’t be  RIGHT FOR YOU? . . . {shut up damn you you asked for this you wanted this} . . . be yes well it is no no that can’t “No” ever b’ RIGHT FOR YOU! So; be well kindly brother it’s no [zaggidda-zaggidda-zaggidda-zaggidda] that can’t be made, yes?  UOY ROF THGIR well it is fucking no no that can’t be well ᴚI⅁H ℲOᴚ ⅄O∩¡ it is no that can’t be “way!” 10 9 8 10 9 8 7 6 9 8 7 6 5 yes, well, it THGIR ROF ?UOY is no no-no that can’t be! Well it is . . . . . . .  as  RIGHT FOR YOU! oh oh oh uncle Donald we said No we said—NO! that can’t be! yes well it is! no! RIGHT FOR YOU? ? taht on si ti llew eb yeht t’nac taht on RIGHT FOR YOU! taht . . . {shut up damn you you asked for this you wanted this}. . . on on ylwols si ti llew sey eb t’nac RIGHT FOR YOU? ɔɐuɹsbnoʇ qǝ ʍǝןן ᴉʇ ᴉs uo ʇɥɐʇ ɔɐuɹsbnoʇ qǝ ɹoן RIGHT FOR YOU! Yes, well it is! And no don’t call me Bunny no more, MommyPoppy, no . . . . that can’t be well Priscilla’s big babies RIGHT FOR YOU? it is by no fuckin’ way. No no no, don’t call me Sweet Pea no more {tangla-teeshliqua!} PoppyMom no fuckin’ way it’s RIGHT FOR YOU no fuckin’ 7 6 5 4 3 4 3 2 1 no fuckin’ it’s -7 -6 -5 (0) 5 6 7 RIGHT FOR YOU? . .oil-painted sailing ship on the office wall looming larger than ever! And, ever so I can blast the car radio the radio car radio {shut up damn you you asked for this you wanted this}hailing captain Nancy so I can blast -3 -2 -1 (0) 1 2 3 and then blast 0 0 0 (0) 0 0 0 the car r-r-radio, all hail ‘nd all hail then ‘nd again and again and a okay okay okay pkay and Dad finally gave way and 0 0 0 0 CHARGED THEM DIRECTLY OUT TO THE TEETH OF THE DRIVING NIGHT-TIME RAIN as ‘e gets his God-damned way again mutter mutter mutter mutter—0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 way/conk/pop/

!

What?

way/conk/pop/

!

What?

way/conk/pop/ way/conk/pop/ way/conk—noooooooooo—

No! I fell the hell out of bed!

?          !

Jesus Christ Jesus Christ Jesus Christ, you DID?  

Ye’ I did, yes, I

did

fall out of bed—

uh uh

Wow but—4 a.m.? So it is anyway. Time to rise anyway. Get up hit the lights. 

—Jim Meirose

The Art of the Dark Fantastic, S.C. Hickman

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